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And to some extent the level objectification of women that is involved in ogling is an everyday occurrence in our culture.But as I noted elsewhere, the American Psychological Association talked about ogling as one step along a scale:“with sexualized evaluation (e.g.And yet ogling can feed an addiction by adding to what some sex addicts call their “data base” of sexual imagery that they can call up at a later time to use for masturbation or even during sex.It can feed what is essentially a stash of mental pornography even if they have been successful in giving up an actual pornography addiction.Ogling as a form of sexualizing and objectifying people is so common among sex addicts as to be almost universal.And it can also provide a direct trigger to relapse in an addict who gets swept into fantasy.This is how your brother, father, grandfather and every man you’ve ever come into contact with thinks. Some go through a mourning period when they finally realize, that yes, that even their wonderful, sensitive, caring husband is really, deep down inside, a pig. These are extremely brief, primitive thoughts, lasting only milliseconds. Relatives, teachers, and our best friend’s wife are included. This is so obvious I’m surprised it needs mentioning. Masturbation as well as porn has no relationship to how sexually satisfied he is with you. Secondly, we enjoy it because it engages our most primitive instincts and lights up our brain. Women we are extremely attracted to and ones that we are repulsed by are also included.

There are a million ways for a man to brush aside your concern and make you feel that you are overreacting. I have worked with many sex addicts and their partners for whom ogling is a serious problem.In other words, it’s really not about the amount of time.It’s about the intent, the hunting, the feeding, the drinking in, the filling up.”She describes also:“…a different person I know who captures image impressions of women’s bodies and files them away mentally for later fantasy use.These also could be just very brief glimpses of someone’s cleavage or of someone in an every day position that is sexually titillating to the viewer.”This woman’s partner is not unusual.Many sex addicts complain that they are helpless because there are just so many sexy women around and they can’t help looking at them.

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