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I needed to keep my mind clear so I could stay on the right path. A., I was having really bad aches and pains in my back, feeling old [Laughs] and I tried to talk myself into taking pain medicine like a Tylenol or even a glass of wine, then I talked myself out of it and drinking water the whole night.I was so proud of myself because that isn’t in my nature. So yeah, the loss of my brother has taught me so much about myself and life and that’s what is about, how I was lost without him then I came to this realization that he is within me and I am within him, there is no him without me and there is no me without him.For me, a song like “Oblivion” or “Jukai,” those are just like real things that I think about often. As a responsible adult I don’t believe that I would take my own life because I have a daughter and so much to live for and I’m not a selfish person, but sometimes I feel like a lot of people that have passed away in my life were just the best of the best people. Where they get to go to this very peaceful place because they’ve done so much for people in their lives and have lived their life to the best abilities and this is their reward, like a prize?It’s something I’ve always thought about since I was younger.Grief can be a very scary and ugly process but I feel like you articulated it really well through this project through a few different phases.Which one was the most difficult for you to get through? When things weren’t going super well for me, I had a lot of time to think and started to feel like “What is the point of any of this?I wanted it to be a really simple song and this project digs deep but it’s simple where you don’t have to Google any words so he definitely helped with that. D., he produced the song “Only Lovers Left Alive,” and he is also a Cancer like my brother, and Brian from the Fisticuffs is also a Cancer, obviously me and Sean are together.
Her live performances are intimate, avoiding the intricate, overpowering stage designs that are in vogue right now, in favor of simple candlelight. is a journey through grief, love, and self-discovery as Aiko mourns and processes the loss of her brother, Miyagi, who died in 2012 after a battle with cancer.
I don’t harm myself anymore or think about the things I used to think about three years ago when it would get really scary.
I find myself through my songs now, instead of letting my feelings consume me.
It’s something I still deal with, searching for that relationship like a strong connection I had with my brother.
The deepest bond a man and woman can have is the brother and sister relationship, I don’t think there is anything deeper than that.